Life goes on, and I always find it hard to move past the Vivien posts. I don’t ever move past Vivien herself. Though I don’t often talk about it, I live with her loss daily. I also find that the loss of Little Nanny is still an ongoing grief as she was an integral part of my life, and a I measured myself against her yardstick. loss is a tricky thing, as it is just completely changes who you are, gives you a different dimension, just like having a child did. having children I think connected me with the fragility of life, and loss of little nanny and vivien, over and above all the other losses i have had, connected that line with the punch at the end.
So, anyway, life doesn’t stop. we carry on, have joy, love and laughter. And so I have. SB did a week of holiday orchestra after grandparents and cousins left. SHe has always enjoyed hoilday orchestra, and nearly has persuaded BB to give it a try next time. SHe did clarinet in intermediate windband, gamalan, folk and choir. on one of the eveings her friend r2 had a sleepover, which was great, and they played games, watched a dvd and were happy together. I went to the friday concert and I have a few videos on flickr, as she was hidden from me! Concerts were friday and saturday. Although I managed the friday concert, unfortunately was too migrainous on the saturday so I stayed with BB. She was a bit stumped as to what to do in SB’s absence, but eventually settled down to make rafts, and a number of different ones were made and deployed onto the pond quite happily 
. We also did some piano again, as she is re-enthusiastic about starting!
On sunday we baked cakes, played lots and lots of board games together – even BB! we played carcassonne, agricola [full length] and star munchkin. I also used up old fimo to make BB a tealight holder with a glowstone minecraft look [sort of!] we then realised the heat of the candle burnt the lid if it was put on… Having brushed BB’s hair beautifully, she let me french plait it [very briefly!] and we finished snuggled in front of harry potter.
i am struggling slight with my new flickr widget, so apologies for weirdly sized or placed photos!
