Category Archives: General

my parents and my sister’s children came to our house for the august bank holiday weekend. I declared this to be family thanksgiving. it is/was the year anniversary of my sister’s death. something that i find i still can’t talk sensibly about and actually feel guilty when i write anything about it anywhere. i think this is because other people have had a hard year too and writing about my own hard year would perhaps add to the burden of friends too greatly. SO, i thought i would just take this opportunity to say how much i loved my sister, and how desperately much i hoped that she would live and beat the breast cancer. i miss her hugely. i mis her for herself, her generosity and her grumpiness, i miss her for our shared history – she is my only sibling, the person you rely on to know really who you are as you get older, and all your misdemenours, and i miss her for being the person to roll eyes over other family members with. I grieve that she won;t see her kids grow up. they woke me on the morning of our thanksgiving day with their laughter and merriment with my 2, and all this laughter and merriment is now without her. However, i give thanks that we are strong as a family, that particularly due to my parents huge efforts my nephew and niece are coming through this, knowing they are loved and adored, part of a big family who understand their sadness but aren’t trying to trap them in it but helping and wanting them to go through with love and laughter, and not be defined by the losing of their mother. we gave thanks for the many years we shared with viv, and the fun times we had together. we gave thanks that she acheived so much of what she had wanted to. we gave thanks that we had each other. and we managed to get through the day having love and laughter. the kids did lots of playing, some crafting and a bit too much telly watching together on the saturday. i made lovely lasagne with home grown produce. we toasted all those we loved and lost. hadn’t planned to, but e pointed it out.

on the sunday we went to little gransden airshow. have to say M and bb were a pain, partic M. this is because they didn’t have any money left, and SB and E did… so they spent some [only a v little!] whilst M had a major sulk and bb a wail, but tbh she controlled hers way before m did. did enjoy the airshow. partly as had chosen it to do something dad would partic like [and thought m would] SB and e prob enjoyed the most, tho bb lightened up in the end!! would i go again, well prob not, but for plane enthusiasts do think it was a good show.

played board games and wii games at home. the next day was a chilling at home bank holiday sort of day. we went to the park in the village, and this time it was e’s turn to put on her parts, and actually she is quite a pro!! shame, as otherwise it would have been a lovely family amble and play!! however, i do like that my nephew and niece can have strops and tantrums as well as hysterical laughter because it shows things are normalising for them. last year, they pretty much got all they wanted as ‘recompense’ [well, not really but you understand why] and now they are getting used to being normal again.

i love my family

lots of this week has been taken up by holiday orchestra. sb has been going for a while now, and chose this time windband, choir and boomwhackers. unfortunately, her tooth still isn;t fixed as the dentist thinks the bone is tender still, so may not survive she has been referred to the hospital for review of it. she is really worried it will come out and have a false one, but has manfully been struggling with a diamond shaped tooth all month now. however one of the number of things she just can’t do is… play the clarinet.

so this sun we did some emergency viola prac, thought she was nearly grade 1 standard with a bit of luck, [well,she could sight read 2 of the exam pieces] and she can easily read the clef and translate that into notes on the viola. so dh asked on mon if there was a possibility she could transfer to the beginners strings. i think they couldn’t believe their luck as she is only viola so she has been given a fair bit of praise and practiced each night. i think it helps that having advanced at other instruments she can count rests etc. on tues we had lfish and they did some practice together which worked really well [well, apart from bb shrieking and wailing through it...]

As well as holiday orch, we have a plan to wrap up the things we should have finished last year, so we can start the next year on time! this is story of the world book 1 – i have been reading a chapter a day, tho we haven’t done additional reading, galore park junior history 2- 1 more chapter to do and galore park junior english 2 – 3 more chapters, so perhaps not there! the history i am keenest to finish, as we tie in with historyetc, and much better to be running alongside than behind. following merry;s lead, i am suggesting she practices writing in sentences now that writing isn;t so awful to her. we practiced out loud – why does the cat have a black tail… the cat has a black tail because it is a black cat etc etc, so she gets asked why was julius caesar a good emperor and she answers…. Because he conquered lots of countries. obviously this is a work in progress!! She does like the galore park junior books tho, and we do 2 question sections a time, so work through fairly slowly. She has enjoyed reading a really ancient book on kings and queens of england that i was given as a child.

BB has also done some home ed this week. she was moaning about what a noun was for some reason, and i caught sight of first language lessons so we started with a noun is a person, place, thing or idea. she has enjoyed it so far, and memorised the caterpillar poem. i remember stopping at chapter far too many with sb, still on nouns. but we shall see this time. bb rather likes having her own book to do with me currently! her reading has come on, and she is reading level 4 ORT and songbird books quite happily.

thay have both done a fair bit of lego this week as well. sb prefers sylvanians, but bb is a lego addict x x she bought some more with some birthday money found [tho i think it might have been sb;s] and so a lego city is springing up. she bought a couple of books too – a couple of beast quest !! and some lovely books tiddler and zog by julia donaldson. also dh bought some chead dvd, so they ahve watched the 3rd narnia – v nice, and also raining meatballs – v odd and i’m not sure i particularly liked it.

this weekend we are expecting my mum and dad. was aiming for a lovely ambling about time, putting them first and easing them over the first anniversary of my sisters death. however bil is off to china, so my nephew and niece coming too. i love having them visit but had other plans this weekend. however, we will have a thanksgiving feast for family love
SB and DH back from the holiday orchestra concert. her fav bit was the boomwhackers but the viola bit went well too

we had an under the sea theme this year, and I have to say there were really really fabulous costumes lots of thought and skill and a fair bit of humour . I do love party weekend. A chance to chill out with friends, the kids meeting up and having fun and just general how nice it is to be a home educator, and have this bunch of fab people as your not-school gates crowd

Party started with picking A and F up and taking them home with me on fri night. we had curry, chatted, baked and maked [ ] picked lots of fresh produce from the garden and the girls slowly worked out a pattern of getting along, as they don’t meet that often. SMall world that I went to school with F’s best friend’s mum. we stayed up late being convivial and didn’t get up too late the next morning to do all those finishing off things.

kirsty and James were first to arrive, and we decided all quorate at 2 and had the feast in the dining room lots of good things to eat, but think we had reduced cakeage this year, so will bake more next year! [or increased demand ] however, we did seem to have reduced demand for alcohol. not entirely sure whether that was drivers and pregnant ppl or lack of the stalwart drinkers

It was lovely seeing everyone, and i had a lovely time, chatting, chilling, eating and take photos the kids all seemed to have a great time, and this is the first year without a major breakage disaster too – so fab!! love our fire for the outside too, kind of camping but not getting cold. there was plenty of bedspace too.

today was a chilled affair, with lots of tea, coffee, chat in the conservatory, not much tantrumming from tired children [actually none really] and pancakes . when ppl had left, bb took herself straight off to bed!! SB did a mega long viola prac. as her tooth hasn’t been repaired yet, and may not be repairable, playing the clarinet currently not possible so she decided to get her viola to approaching grade one standard today, and i think she has managed it. certainly if she regularly practiced she could do grade 1 this term. hopefully they will let her swap for holiday orchestra.

Anyway, thanks all our fabulous friends for either coming to the party or sending us happy day vibes. Next year’s theme is mythical creatures

this week is the run up to the anniversary of my sister’s death. This year, i cannot help but think of it, but in the future i plan not to. i mostly think of it to help my mum and dad through a difficult weekend. But thinking of death and life, i wanted to put some of the blessings down here, because although my sisters life cut short, i think she, like me, had a lot of joy and blessings. kind of in the order they happened

1. I have been blessed by a loving home and upbringing, with parents that cared deeply for me and strove to help me succeed. they backed me emotionally and supported me always. Being short of money and with outside stressors did not stop them from making my sister and I a priority.
2. i have been blessed with my wider family. loving grandparents, aunts, uncles, sister, great-aunts, cousins etc. they have enriched my childhood and adulthood. thankyou for the love and laughter that has surrounded me.
3. i have been blessed by my musical skills. they, and the encouragement i was given to persue them, have given me hours of joy over my lifetime.
4. i have been blessed by my education. the teaching and the learning have given me joy in piecing together the world and how it has been and maybe works. I have been blessed with the opportunity to enjoy education and the time to take it further, well past the age when many have to work.
5. i have been blessed by my life partner. We met when i was just 19, but 23 years later and i am still blessed by his humour, love, caring and friendship.
6. i am blessed by my work. i don’t always think this! but i have been given an opportunity to make a real and tangible difference, and that is both an honour and a privilege – as well as being something of a challenge. i am lucky to find my work rewarding and valuable.
7. i am doubly blessed by my children, who are the centre of my universe and a joy in my life. Their presence improves each day, with laughter and unconditional love.
8. i am blessed by my environment. i live in a lovely house, with a lovely conservatory in a lovely area. I don’t have to deal with pollutions, contaminants, natural and not disasters, war or famine. I am thankful for this.
9. I am blessed by my friends, whose care, chivvying and laughter have supported me in dark times and cheered away the grey.

When I count up my blessings, it would be churlish to rail against fate for those that I have lost, or the work-family sacrifices that i might be making. I have already had a good, fulfilling life and am thankful for it.

So where is 10? well i have saved it currently. I do hope to add the blessing of health and longevity or grandchildren or seeing my children grow up to be fulfilled in their lives to my list one day. i dont want to have had all my blessings yet

Butterbean, Josie (Patch of Puddles) and Shannon (Going Against the Flow). all born in November in 2004, and hence dubbed ‘The Triplets’

Here they are at around 6 months old at our first Muddlepuddle Summer Camp:

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Around a year old:

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At around 2 1/4:

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And now they are 6:

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i have been playing a lot of games with sb and bb, and a lot of wii games too. trying to make the most of all the time i currently have at home. Some painting, crafting and baking. both girls have made me a cake
the girls have done lots of home ed, with bb finally playing the cello – i haven’t given her any hints yet! she has been making up her own piano music too. SB has really been working hard.
DH has been doing the window – woohoo
my f-i-l has been admitted to hospital this last week with gallstone problems, so m-i-l staying with us. luckilly he is better now, tho going to return later to have a lap chole. m-i-l has enjoyed being with the girls i think, and also helped ship shape the house a bit – as noticed by zoe

today was historyetc. we had a great day. i did the roman pots – decorated, broken, buried, found and glued together , there was sari dressing up, game inventing , fimo indian wall decorations, people picture frame painting, chappatti and dahl making. it went really well and was very enjoyable. lovely seeing everyone, and my first day off work for 10 straight days, so much needed . bb had a moment with a lost lizard up a tree, beaurifully camouflaged! rescued by katy . thanks all for a lovely day. working so much means i barely keep up with family let alone friends and so good to see people.

actually, whilst SB having an absolutely fab time at pgl, BB was a bit moochy. she really REALLY missed her big sister. i was at work a lot, and unfotunately am going to have to work most of my wednesdays for the next 6 months, but with a guarentee that i will get them back at the end. this means that home ed is going to have to work differently. with me working so very much more than full time, DH and the girls will need to do it all whilst i am at work, so that when i get home we can do music prac, story of the world, but mostly play a game, do a craft or read. already the increased hours are leaving me feeling shattered and burnt out from both ends. the girls grizzle more [well bb] and i don’t respond well it also means that there may be significantly less blogging, i am running out of available time, and don’t plan to use the time with the girls to blog!

anyway, i made sure i did things with bb on my return from work, and on the weds [which i did have off] we did playing together, lego and went swimming again, so that i could feel that i was part of the family, rather than an evening visitor. I read stories every night, snuggled up to watch a film.

DH did do some of the window DIY – woohoo! and we have painters in working on the sash windows. gradually this house is coming together. BB and DH made a wooden boat. BB did most of the sawing, hammering etc herself whilst DH oversaw the project. she then painted it multicolour and it looked fabulous

at the weekend SB returned – hooray BB and i made a cake whilst waiting for her, did some trampolining together and some more playing. After SB returned we went geocaching round the village lake – i am planning to increase the number of walks i do too . Sunday we cut out and decorated lots of fish, in prep for our summer party, and we went pond dipping and tree climbing. it was a lovely day when i got home DH had worked hard on the window, and i made courgette mousakka for us, full of ingredients from the garden, and sausages with home grown veg for the girls. All very happy

what i should have added was that SB had a fab time. she really enjoyed it, and time spent with Maddy. she loved all the activities, thought they had a great leader and had lots of laughs, and she would like to do more climbing next time. the veggie food was disgusting apparently, and one girl in the group kept trying to stuff meat in her mouth, but this doesn’t seem to have phased her. she had no major injuries, tho one of her broken teeth needs reconstructing again!!!

it is taking me ages to blog the canada photos, in part because waiting for that day to be flickred. so i will do a quick post for coming home. dad met us at airport, and i was hugely surprised by the wave of emotions i had. i found out my sister died in baggage reclaim last time i went to canada, and it was all just a little bit much.

back and hugs with family, and delivery of presents stewart and the kids there too so a good family reunion, to take my mind off desires to emigrate

the next day we went home, a quick few hours before niece and nephew arrived to stay for the week. we had a great week with them staying, and having the 4 children is often easier than just 2 as they get on so well together. they generally played on the tues, wed was historyetc – which they both love, thurs dh took them to a film (cars 2). they did mostly loads of crazy playing, crafts and sidling off to watch sarah jane . enjoyed trampolining, climbing trees and just generally being happy. It is so great to see the kids blooming again after the loss of their mum last year.

weds was history etc, with a chinese theme. i mght blog separately. we made maps and made sugar cube great walls of china, we made fans, decorated willow pattern plates, origami fish and tangrams. one of the best things was the harvest and stirfry though. i went into the veg patch – full of harvestable food and a bit jungle like – and harvested different colour beans, chard, courgettes, carrots and it got chopped by assorted kids and then stirfried. v yummy

saturday SB went off to her PGL week activity holiday with her friend maddy. she was v much looking forward to it. bit of an eek moment for me tho! a whole week!!! i did some crafts with the 3 kids left, and then with stewart we went geocaching in the village. had a lovely walk along some fields and easily found the cache, as well as lots of blackberries, some sloes and some not quite ripe wild plums.

sunday stewart and the children set off home, and BB and i went swimming.

i have to say, leaving the rockies was really really hard. i could have quite happily spent the whole holiday/rest of my life there. however, we had promised drumheller to bb, and knew it would be worth it. we got up early and drove up a mountain to a viewpoint over banff and there i cooked breakfast just as the pancakes were ready a tour bus stopped, and all the ppl coming off visibly smelt the pancakes and looked over. great to have breakfast with a view .

we then drove to johnstons canyon for our final excursion in the rockies. it was amazingly busy and we couldnt park in the car park – a first! so we parked on the road side and walked up. the walk follows the canyon up past a lower and upper falls to inkpots at the top. we knew we had to leave by 1 ideally, so knew we wouldn’t get to the top. the walk really clings to the canyon sides, in some places having ‘catwalks’ ie balconies sticking out for the walkways. it was a great walk and not overly challenging to the lower fall, and v beautiful. it was far busier than we were used to tho! there was also a geocache nearby. we started the wall to the upper fall, but realised time running short, so romped back, picked up an icecream and readied the van for a long drive i had premade sarnies for all of us, dh and mine with some fruit and munch bars in the front, and water, and on the girls table, their own sarnies, crisps, popcorn and fruit. thought we would be well provisioned for a long drive

so we set off, the drive was easy enough, have to say both dh and i had half an eye at the wingmirrors to see the last of the mountains as we went past. the change to flat farmland is a bit sudden, and a shmck to the system! but we made good time, and soon we were nearing drumheller. since there is only the summer to do road works, there is a franticness to it, and a whole road was pulled up to gravel, not making for a happy driving experience as went v v slowly. we drove through an area farmed by a hutterite community, and later saw some of the community selling fresh food in drumheller.

the badlands are v odd hoodoo formations cutting through alberta, and drumheller is there. we could tell we were getting close as dinosaur statues are everywhere! everthing is advertised with a dinosaur. our campsite had loads of them . was v nice campsite with a shop and great showers . we had curry for tea [i had made too much before and frozen half, so nice and easy to do ] and had a lovely shower, then we drove to drumheller museum as it is open till late to book things for the next day. we booked the dinosite for me and bb and the dinodig for sb and dh. then the girls played on the outdoor playpark area – a kind of soft play until bored and we went home ready for an early start the next day.

reflecting on our time in the rockies, we had a great time. the motorhome was a brill way of seeing it, and gave an extra dimension of freedom and excitement. we tried to see a mix of things – lakes, canyons, walking trails, mountains, museums, experiences – the glaciers and the jasper tramway, hot pools and watersports – rowing, rafting, canoeing as well as a lot of driving about. if we could only go to one area, it would be jasper, as there is something of everything in that area and v beautiful and there was loads more you could see or do. i wouldn;t have missed kootenay though either, and enjoyed the way we saw lots of different areas. i would highly recommend time in the rockies for anyone i also think there is loads more there i would have loved to see or do, and if i got the chance to go again i would grab it. holiday of a lifetime tho are few and far between, and if we have money to do something this big again, i imagine we will go to somewhere completely different.

we decided we would up and out, and stay at the tunnel mountain camp the next night, even if it isn’t so picturesque, because what is the use of pictureseque when you can’t leave the motorhome!! having not used the camping blocks, however, we did have a sani dump run to do, and that ended up a bit of a palava. it is the not so brill part of motorhoming, tho not too dreadful either as long as all goes smoothly. unfortunately it didn’t . DH got a bit stuck and had a wobbly moment, i went out to help and got bitten to pieces, but at least did manage to separate us from the inpipe, tho leaving a bit behind on the rv – well, so dh told me. arghing at yet another ‘thing’ we drove into banff for brekkie determined to enjoy the day. we were nearly there when dh had a ‘doh’ moment that the bit he had been trying to remove actually was part of the van – thank goodness i hadn’t been successful in removing that too!

the odd think about banff a about 9am is that it is pretty much deserted! the shops only open at 10, so despite worrying about parking, and parking somewhere that was 2 hours only, we would have been fine. dh moved the van afterwards to a more permanent spot near the boats . our idea was to grab an early all canadian breakfast. hmmmm, didn’t imagine the complete lack of places to do it! eventually we found somewhere called coyote that was really fab. sb had buttermilk and blueberry pancakes with roast potatoes and scrambled egg also on the plate!! bb had just buttermilk pancakes with maple syrup – we had ordered her just 1 as a childs portion, but after much wailing at that upgraded it to the adult three. she ate…. one, obviously DH and i chose diff things and had half each, a mediterannean omelette and burrito, with potato bravas and pancake of bb each! was far too much food and we were completely and utterly stuffed. yummy meal.

the girls and i then went to the parks canada info place and dh moved the van. unfortunately, though they could give us our banff explorer tag, they couldn’t give us the kootenay ones, so arranged to get that sent to our home – v v helpful these parks canada ppl. we then watche a screening on changing use of the parks – including a fab 70′s looking round a motorhome with wet and dry cabinets and the display on tracks and scats. v informative.

DH joined us and we walked along the riverfront to… the canoe hire! we hadn’t said anything about it to bb as didn’t want a repeat of the wailing at lake louise, but we hired 2 canoes for 2 hours at the same price it would have been for 1 there. bb was absolutely beside herself with utter happiness. the rest of us were also really happy we went bb and dh, sb and i. we told the young things that we were enthusiastic novices and needed to choose the quietest river route so they directed us up a slow sidestream to the vermillion lakes. it was perfect

I cannot put into words just how much i loved paddling along with sb, zigzagging up the creek, crashing into the riverside, ducking under the branches that we hadn’t avoided we didn’t ‘pull’ at the same strenght, and it took me a while to learn to pull and steer as it were dh had it easier, as bb pull didnt alter much the direction of the boat, and she was mostly enthusiastically splashing. and it was soooo peaceful . there weren’t too many canoe hirings, and many of them went up the river rather than our creek, so only occassionally did we have to alert others of the dangers of coming near us . we went under a railway bridge as a train went over – v exciting, and then finally paddled our way to the vermillion lakes. this was just so beautiful [and tranquil if you ignore us ] and we had canoeing races, and sb and i tried to go backwards for a bit – and then we just revelled in the perfection of being on an empty lake reflecting the sky and the mountains.

we went back and got in just before our 2 hours were up, having thoroughly enjoyed it. i begin to really wish we lived on a lake or minor waterway so from the boats we had an icecream and enjoyed the sunshine and decided which of the museums to go to. we went to the banff park museum first. A bit odd as stuffed with stuffed animals, and SB got the unnerving thing, but bb quite happy looking around them. there was an interesting kids hands on bit as well. we then went ot the Luxton first nations museum which was very interesting, but a bit timewarped, and possibly could do with a bit of a refurb and rethink to make it sing to kids, especially when they are getting used to interactive elements everywhere. the tableaux were a bit unnerving – as sb pointed out, no one was smiling. i think it could have done with being a celebration of the culture a bit more perhaps, tho i completely get the need to catalogue how the coming of the pioneers changed things irrevocably. sb chose a wedding card for my cousins there, but neither chose to buy anything else. we went back into banff and the girls played at the park area until it was time to head off to a campsite and consider meal options

we went to the mountain tunnel site for motorhomes. it was kind of like a semigrassed carpark! however, no mosquitos and we could see the mountains. bb found a friend fairly swiftly, and she and they ran around looking for ground squirrels and leaping of bridges etc . after tea we then got into the motorhome and went for a drive. we drove to lake minnewanka, which is indeed v beautiful, and wandered about. not far along trails as lots of bears there, and then drove to johnson lake and finally some winding paths back to the campsite. we saw elk and bighorn sheep, and a wolf girls were both asleep, and we sat out with a beer for a bit before calling it a day. our last full day in the mountains.