Feeling Better and Decisions

well, marginally better anyway, enough to blog as long as I don’t actually look at the screen – suits my typing style anyway! Temp gone down, still migrainous, but heavy duty tablets taken.

SB and chris nipped to the shops for milk and bread. BB asleep – at least she slept better last night, though SB instead squiggled her way into our bed! Don’t know what they have been up to all day though!

We are off to my parents for Easter, which will be nice. I think I added on end of last blog that my Nan’s breast cancer spread further.I am devastated by this, as though all too aware that the 5 year survival was 50% at best, you hope that the person you know will be in that 50%. She is on year 4. Also, had the GP sent hr to hospital 7 years previously when she had first noticed a lump, rather than telling her it was nothing, she might actually have been cured [rage!] – or if I’d have known!!!

She is fiercely independent at 82, and lives on her own in Norfolk, and none of us is particularly close – I will be the closest when we move. She has severe arthritis, so walking and chores are hard – but she doesn’t accept help. My Aunt has said she can live with them, but Nan is not keen as she would be alone in the daytime, and no-where actually within walking distance she could go, so feels she would completely lose all independence. Also, this is the house she spent all her married life with my grandad, so doesn’t really want to let go.

Ideally we would have been closer, and I did look for jobs in Norfolk, so we could have popped by at least on 1ce or 2ce weekly basis, and done a big shop together etc. We will try fortnightly from where we are – which my aunt and my mum both visiting monthly, that should help.

I am aware though that as cancer is spreading through her bones, her present independent living may be compromised. I’ve discussed it with chris, and good fellow that he is, we are going to tell her she has an open invitation to come and live with us as we live across road from 2 shops in a village location, and family will be at home most of week. No idea of the practicalities, but I’m sure we would muddle through. I don’t think she will accept, though I will be happy if she does. But at least she will know that if she ever wants to, our door is open to her. Time is just so precious isn’t it, both with my 2 girls, who grow up so quickly, and then with those that I have loved all my life that will leave me too soon.