i’m not sure i can bear even one more night of multiple feeds. BB not slept properly since we moved, and I am truly shattered. Have gone so far as to buy tin of formula, but not managed to bear to use it.
i feel such a failure for even considering bailing out, but if I could get some sleep at night, maybe I would have a bit more perspective and not be knocked about by every passing squall.
Posted in Butterbean, General
Our flikr importr playing up – in fact sitting to the front of this posting, so I am just hoping the spelling etc better than usual.
Antoher parcel day from the great ebay book hunt – DK picturepedia set of 12 – fantabulous!! So we started with the dinosaur one straight away. Also the DK eyewitness native american.
We had a rush on to get out, as driving to Norfolk – never the easiest of destinations , to see little Nanny and Aunty Peggy. Aunty Margaret was also there. the drive wasn’t so bad – for a change. Little Nanny welcomed us at the door, and is walking ever so much better – even if mostly with a frame. She has lost over a stone in a month, and I didn’t have many empty cartons returned, so told her to do better for next time.
We had a nice time, it was raining, and SB really needed to rampage around, so i was a bit stressed, as Nanny’s house full of treasured fragile ornaments. Mostly kept under control with workbooks, reading and distraction, though a few words were had on and off. BB also a bit uneasy, so perhaps making me tighter with SB. She did showcase her new ability to pull herself up to her feet and look very smug.
Aunty Peggy and Uncle Robert came round. She is looking so different – steroid effect mostly, but also tremendously aged. She did well though, getting SB’s name right and BB and talking sensibly to them. You can see her body as giving up though, weeping sores up and down legs, and terribly bruised arms [again probably steroids]. Although she has brain mets, and they were obviously effecting her – as not the Aunty Peggy of 6 months ago, enough of her was the same so that I felt I could say a real goodbye in my heart to a woman I have seen as an extra grandparent all my life. It is hard to predict when the sands will have stopped flowing, but not long it seems. since my Aunt noticed a dramatic deterioration even from 2 weeks ago, i’m not going to kid myself that even if I get to see her again that she will be anywhere near herself. This really is a year of loss in our family, and I just don’t have my usual strength to manage. They [as in with Uncle Robert] popped by only briefly, and even that was a strain for her.
SB and Nanny enjoyed cutting up runners to go with the pasta bake I had brought for tea, Aunty Margaret played with BB, and I was domestic. It was nice seeing Aunty Margaret again, as we met so often in Leeds. Also nice seeing Nanny approaching her old self. Though she is obviously frail, and more frightened about the future. Managing for now, though I worry about the winter, and she doesn’t actually get out of the house.
Fantastic cloud formation on the way home. Poor photo as had to wait for a layby, and wasn’t as good by then.
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Posted in Butterbean, General, Out and About, photos, Stringbean
on things I can’t change.
reading Jax made me howl over things I can’t change, so nipped to Ros to remind me not to obsess.
It obviously isn’t getting particularly easier
Posted in General
Or at least seems to in our house. Got home from work to find maths type books - singapore and miquon liberally scattered over the floor, a magazine from nanna f as well, where she had written out a crossword, and filled in lots of puzzles.
I think SB going through a very dynamic autonomous era at the present, and really diving into learning spontaneously. Oddly, it makes me feel even more disorganised that I haven’t got things at my fingertips for her. Writing and maths are the flavour to savour, though a lot of read aloud history and stories going on. The usborne farm series are proving to be a bit of a hit, with SB just quoting the first page. Certainly a lot of processing is happening.
Through ebay got lots of books coming through in a steady stream, so looked at the usborne through the ages homes and houses, and also barefoot animal stories from around the world [4 of] which we do a fair bit of talking around – geography, beliefs etc. Am trying to have a rest a bit on beliefs, as noticed when swimming that SB said of the life guard to herself ‘she has a cross, she must be a christian’ and felt that this was seeming a bit labelling, and don’t want her to think she has to attatch a label to herself. Sticking to gods and goddesses as plurality therefore, and mostly ancient. Science also a bit of a back burner – Chris has loads of Krampf experiments tucked away, and I really need to get a resource box organised so that we can experiment like mad [sb likes!]
After tea she was again desperate to do some miquon with the cuisinaire rods [which for a year I wondered why I bought them, and now I know!] and was not keen to go to bed until she’d finished a page… and another one!
I used to read the autonomous ‘trust to the process’ type posts, and panic and have deep suspicions, but I see it in action, and it is working. However, I am a queen of listmakers, and somewhere high on the anal retentiveness scale [a former boss recurrently threatened to list me for an anal stretch], so I think Chris and I need to come to agreement on recording the broad brushes of home ed, and perhaps develop my ideas for a broad brush story arc for things such as history, with points for incorporating geography along the way.
Basically trying to predict tangents to go down, and facillitating the resources rather than ‘today we are looking at france’ type arrangements! lso with the piano in another room, we are forgetting about it [like the tv] so I want some kind of game that we draw cards for activities [games, music, crafts, experiments as well as a few readers/workbooks] and then do them [cheating allowed so actually get one she wants to do!] at those lulls, so that it again sparks off using some of the hidden away resources.
Also Chris needs to BLOG! After all, this is his blog [and the flikr is his account too, that I seem to have overtaken. born to organise, thas me!]. cos when she is 5, i want to start some way of recording what we do as we do it with comments on the other things you notice – like increased attention span, and processing info thoughts etc. Like Jan, so that if ever we become known to PTB [and this area strong on that, so anticipate it will be near instantaneous] we can at least be confident in our body of evidence – even if we decline to show it.
Other ponderings, I think i’ve swapped my desires from an eglu to a swallow now where is that fairy godmother???
Posted in General, history, literacy, numeracy, Ponderings, Stringbean's HE
Just now! not shuffles, but holding my hands walked towards daddy and then he took over – the full works – voluntary lifting of feet and moving them forwards in a purposeful manner! She was very proud of herself.
Posted in Butterbean, General
Had contemplated going to Norfolk today, but instead we are going next Wed.
got up – reluctantly! And immediately had to build specific lego house – the client was a particularly demanding one! Some relief came when we went swimming. SB still doing the drowning dog stroke – but I am working on confidence to try other things! She is very confident at launching of the side – nearly a sitting dive to be honest, and then carrying on swimming. She also likes to do dolphin ducks under and over. BB also loves the water, and kicks and splashes wildly, with careful preparation she can float on her back – but for a few seconds only, as she then tries to turn over and sinks.
On the way home we picked up some more fresh plums, sweetcorn and runner beans from various stalls on the road. Talked with the somewhere in 80′s no doubt plum lady about the village and changes, and my desire for an orchard. She says I can walk the children round it whenever I like [5 acres]. I know, and orchard and chickens – must have watched the good life once too often. [partic if you look at our veg bed photos on flikr - oops, but has been productive, despite the weeds]
More lego, and then we decided to read the castle flip book and make our own – which we did. A minor contretemps as SB had spotted a roman house kit from DK which i will put aside for a couple of years, and really wanted to build that instead. Anyway, a lovely castle from loo rolls was made and painted [crafts]. I was pleased to have done it, as going through old photos, we seemed to do a lot of arts and crafts, and this really has slowed down a lot – due to lack of planning by me I suspect.
Some story reading – including Ulysses by Usborne, and the she helped me make pasta bake for tea – so some to freeze again for little Nanny. SB has got over courgettes now, as it contained those and fennel, red peppers alll chopped but visible. Still whizzed the mushrooms and onions though. Also pine nuts and olives. yummy!
Chris putting SB to bed, as I’ve got to do this major talk for work [still!], and BB burbling at my feet. Chris has done some slashing to the overgrowth in the veg beds this afternoon – good man.
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Posted in art and crafts, Butterbean, Cooking, gardening, General, literacy, SB-PE, Stringbean's HE
These are best viewed larger on flikr, but does highlight that they are out of focus. I tried a few different settings, but at max zoom, I just don’t think the camera was up for it. gives a good impression of how magical it was though.
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We didn’t try and do a lot, but had a great time together – it is just so nice to relax with my girls.
Lots of ebay stuff came this morning, and I am trying to send some of it back – a trouser suit for work – with a skirt?? and a pair of trousers whose zipper is missing?? Not received a reply yet. Also some DK stuff for SB – pyramids, and an oxford children’s middle ages history book [preparing ahead]. The postie said she specially came to ours first this morning!
This must have got SB in the mood, as we started by letterland reading, and when she went downstairs and I tried on clothes, she got out various match and sort books – miquon maths, singapore earlibird 2A and my pals are here primary 1a, the jigsaw sticker books and some ladybird work books, and flitted betweent htem. HOWEVER, THE THING THAT ABSOLUTELY FIXATED HER TODAY WAS THE CUISINAIRE RODS. SHe made pattern after pattern with them, totally grasps there relationship with each other. In total hours must have been spent in absorbed fascination with square patterning. [have put some of them on flikr]. We also did some playing with the globe – and she is very taken with the word antipodean!
She was very good helping me to make dinner, including going outside and helping dig up some potatoes. The sweetcorn are really coming on – ? ripe enough to eat next week. She insisted that we pick some more elderberries to make some more juice for the jelly – so will set some more off whilst awaiting jamjars. The dinner is one of the simplest yet very yummy – 2 packets of lindamcartney sausages, 2 tins chilli beans and some onion, with layered potato on top with mustard. In oven for 1 hour roughly. SB likes the onion whizzled up, and I pop in some whizzled mushrooms as well. Spare for little nanny.
BB has been walking/shuffling sideways alot, doing that magic movement thing across rooms, and pulling herself up. She is really practising waving, and enjoys SB’s musical percussion set. She definiately is more keen on finger foods that the feeding her things. Today is her 9 month milestone!
Finally, after tea, a bit of magic. SB noticed a hot air balloon out of the window, so we looked and thought there may be 2, so we went into the garden – there were 14! Have taken some piccies of them over the church – sish I had a good camera with a good zoom though, as ours not good enough for this! We enjoyed scooting about garden and house to get the best view, and watching them going up and down.
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Posted in art and crafts, Butterbean, Cooking, General, geography, literacy, numeracy, photos, science, Stringbean's HE